By Peter Pavarini
About now, bloggers like me feel compelled to write something pithy about the year just ended or the one about to begin. Although I’ve never put much faith in New Year’s resolutions, particularly ones that required dramatic change, I have occasionally written about one’s goals and aspirations.[i] This is another short piece about making the most of the time we are given.
A Gradual Progression
Personal transformation rarely occurs because of one or even a handful of major events in someone’s life, but rather by a gradual progression anchored by many little moments. The following is attributed to American poet Emily Dickinson (1830-1886):
“If you take care of the small things, the big things take care of themselves. You can gain more control over your life by paying closer attention to these little things.”
Although Dickinson’s reclusive lifestyle and early death didn’t suggest that she found much success applying these words to her life, she is rightfully remembered as one of America’s greatest poets.
Ben Franklin probably comes closer to my thinking about doing many small things well:
“Little strokes fell great oaks.”[ii]
The little strokes of life are profoundly important to our growth because we live in those moments and are shaped by them. The character formed by keeping one’s room clean, to borrow from Jordan Peterson[iii], is both metaphorically and literally the first step toward ordering your life. Such a habit builds confidence, reduces the clutter around you and creates a foundation for solving larger problems, not only in your life, but also in the world.
“The man who removes a mountain begins by carrying away small stones.”
Chinese Proverb
Relentless little moments also reveal the oversights and moral failures that become bigger, more destructive character flaws over time. Few people go broke because of making one bad financial decision or experiencing one unfortunate event. Rather, it’s usually a series of short-sighted, self-indulgent mistakes that cause the proverbial “house of cards” to collapse. Fraudsters don’t initially set out to defraud everyone, but when they think they can get away with their deceptive behavior, they’re inclined to do it again and again.
Personal Commitment
Is commitment essential to transformative change? Of course. But successful change isn’t dependent upon a single decision following a dramatic event. Commitment can be shown by doing lots of small, mundane things consistently well. Most of the great industrialists didn’t achieve success because of one spectacular invention or breakthrough.
We all know how Thomas Edison tried at least 3,000 different materials for light bulb filaments before deciding on carbonized bamboo. And then there was Henry Ford, famous for his voluminous production of automobiles in the early 20th century, who said:
“Nothing is particularly hard if you divide it into small jobs.”
Ford was neither the inventor of the first motor vehicle nor the first to use assembly line manufacturing; however, Ford Motor Company’s success with these concepts revolutionized the automobile industry and made basic cars affordable to the average consumer.
As the year 2026 begins, I’m resolving to be less concerned about “gaining control over my circumstances,” to paraphrase Emily Dickinson, and becoming more reliant upon trust. That’s not easy for someone who spent most of his adult life practicing law.
In Proverbs, the book of the Old Testament primarily written by King Solomon, one verse makes clear how every New Year should be approached:
“In their hearts humans plan their course, but the Lord establishes their steps.”
Proverbs 16:9
Trusting In What We Can’t Control
Where does someone find the courage, patience and faith to trust what he cannot control? That’s not just a spiritual or rhetorical question. In the modern world, we’re constantly asked to trust in things over which we have little or no control:
- Will the plane land safely despite the compromised state of the air traffic control system?
- Will my vote in the upcoming midterms really matter if the integrity of the electoral system is questionable?
- Will I get the right treatment, drug, etc. if I’m hospitalized with a life-threatening condition?
- Will I be protected by law enforcement personnel if I ever find myself in the middle of an angry crowd?
Because of these and other uncertainties, life presents us with an endless series of decisions that can’t be made without trusting in the unknown to some degree.
Drawing Strength and Purpose from Little Moments
It is still wise to plan and get the best information on every subject before making a choice; however, we should stop “sweating the small stuff” and instead draw strength and purpose from every little moment. For instance, acknowledge the smile of a random stranger, appreciate the beauty of a new bird at your backyard feeder or a glorious sunrise or sunset, or enjoy that tune which gets stuck in your head like you’ve encountered an old friend; or seize the opportunity to help someone needing assistance at the grocery store or pick up a piece of trash that accidentally blew into the road, and so on.
Quite often, things over which we think we have no control can turn out to be the best part of our day. Similarly, we can do or say something that might be the best part of someone else’s day.
Human beings have an innate need to figure things out. We spend most of our waking hours trying to plan the next critical conversation, the next purchase, the next schedule conflict. The rest of the time we give far too much thought to the past – how things might have gone differently if this or that had happened. It’s no wonder most people feel exhausted by the end of the day.
The alternative to needing to be in constant control is believing someone greater than you already has it figured out. This requires trust which I suggest comes from living in the moment – not inside your head.
There is peace to be found in doing small things well, not only for yourself but for others. At moments when you wish you had the answer to something big that’s been troubling you, opportunities still abound to add to what’s good, beautiful and true in your world.
[i] “My Reverse Bucket List”, https://alessandrocamp.com/2023/01/25
[ii] Poor Richard’s Almanack (1758)
[iii] Jordan Peterson, The Twelve Rules for Life: An Antidote to Chaos, Random House (2018)
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